WarminG you but FreezinG me..

2005-04-01T12:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
the final entry..
no more poetic stuff, juz me..
let tis blog b my memory,
the 1st 3 mths of emotions i xperienced..
thank every1..
1stly,my brothers..ah thoong and wei yang,
they show me true fwendship, loyalty and all, been through thick and thin 2gether,
now thoong is wif a new ger, wish him luck man..
hope wei yang tink things through and stop letting his emotions get in his way..
follow up r the pals..ade,dragg and wanling,
outgoing and fun 2 b wif, all the best dudes..
all my fwends..KC, arthur, wei qiang, franklin, juan, huiyi, junjie, aileen
din spend as much time wif u guys, so dun really noe much bout all of u,
but u guys r also part of the xtreme fun we had..thx too..
im not 4getting a very special person..sondra..
her prescence in my life alone gave me the courage 2 continue 2 pursue my dreams in tkd..
she calls me an angel..
but she actually is the true angel..
i wouldnt eva believe tt in this world,there would still b such an innocent and cute ger around till i saw her..she really purifies me..though she may b busy wif all her training and work..and now even not around me anymore..but, i'll remember her 4eva..days wif her r the shortest but the sweetest..thx a lot..hope i make it 2 the SEA games and see u there..gd luck in all ur competitions..i'll b ur moral supporter..stay fit all the time alrite?...im silly..she wun b seeing tis blog..miss her..

tts all..
the end..

Blogged by,
- Ong Wei Jian -

2005-03-26T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
last few days of crap,
within 14 days of happiness,
withing 1st 3 mths of great times,
morphs in2 an aftermath of drepression..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

if its 5 yrs tt u need 4 freedom,
den its 5 yrs tt i'll wait..

2005-03-25T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
the angel,
fallen..
due 2 the emptied bottle of love..
the bee,
dead..
due 2 the emptied jar of hunny..
hope of the impossible revival..
feels like being buried alive..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

true love or not,
they will fly..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

wings grow on everything..
unseen..
unknown..
and unmistakenly true..

2005-03-24T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
ended..
back 2 misery..
all alone...again...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

the everchanging smell of her hair..
her tender soft hands..
her flat tummy..
her strong body..
her cheerful smile..
her angelic character..
her her....
all her...
but all is over as well..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

bless her wif happiness..
i hope she'll b back..
anytime..
anyday..
i'll b waiting..

2005-03-23T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
feel the tensity,
the pressure of blood..
burst my veins,
blast my brains,
like an overflowing pipe of endless sewage,
unstoppable pain cuz of inevitable shitting..
only way out,
to follow the flow..

2005-03-22T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
no1 there..
nth there..
look deep and soon understand the loneliness,
misunderstand and live in delusion..
temporary happiness will lead 2 eternal sadness,
death will den await..
no amount of tears will gain pitiness,
but it still sheds..
how stupid..

2005-03-20T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
staring in2 whites,
wif no bleaching effects of dark thoughts..
where there's light,
there's shadow..
no way 2 cleanse the our dirt,
...StaineD...

2005-03-19T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
crappy family ties,
where elders manipulate younger,
abusing the authority of their position,
decreasing their respect with no respect..
unreasonable actions affecting me,
decreasing my self esteem,
lowering my morale,
dropping my character to a near 0,
the only increase is hatred..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

my antidote,
slowly healing,
peeling off pain,
bit by bit..
tts just a lil bit of all her greatness..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

slowly getting sick..
watch my hatred and anger..
i can b more than a devil..

2005-03-18T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
conversion of sadness to happiness through my madness over her loveliness..
luckiest man i may b,
luckiest lady is she?
times of 2gether-ness arent important..
cuz distance makes love grow..
time 2gether will b precious..
but my precious she'll always b..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ur heart penetrated mine..
locked like chains..
fitted nicely..
beautifully..
sweet..

2005-03-09T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
she runs like the wind..
blows me 2 the river of love..
drowning me deep 2 face the titanic..
the ship of love of jack and rose..
like dem i hope..
no bad endings though..
but pls..
give me the breeze..
and not be gone wif the wind..

2005-03-07T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
hush..
hear the pumping heartache..
look at the internal bleeding..
feel the sadness..
taste the bitterness..
smell the stench of life..

life in the old campus unxpectedly ending early..
training..and more training..
may i make it..
show it..
make her proud..
but doubt she will..
cuz she wun even noe..

it hurts..
alone i shall continue walking the endless road of eternal despair..

2005-03-06T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
betrayal,
sadness,
anger,
evil..

i've seen enough,
i've heard enough,
i've been through enough..

screw the bad ppl,
screw the world,
screw life..

2005-03-05T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
my mind is stuck,
stuck in her glued heart,
heart of purity,
purity purifys my world,
world of darkness and regret,
regret of things not done earlier,
earlier i hope..
hope is perished..
perished chance..
chance will not b there anymore..

2005-03-03T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
50 : 50,
to 0 : 100,
things turned unxpected,
a neutral ending,
angel i am to her,
angel i will b 2 her..
may she rise 2 happiness wif the powerful..

2005-02-22T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
50 - 50..im troubled..
walk away smiling..or walk away crying..
things will nv b the same again..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

its all about looks!!
i wan gd looks!!

2005-02-21T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
happiness shall not start..
my company will end..
may the beautful side of life cleanse ur tots..
i shall walk alone..

2005-02-17T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
deeper i fell..
darker it is..
hopeless i feel..
sadness there are..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

repelling ties of ppl,
distrupt the 1 way attraction of fwendship..
silent i shall b,
monitoring the silencing,
agitating me 2 put every1 2 slp..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

wif u around,
my life is 1 huge step closer 2 perfect..

2005-02-14T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
time will fly and u will go..
ur heart is all i want,
but i dun even get the chance..
possible hoping,
impossible happening,
able 2 look now is all tt matters..
pills of happiness u shall keep 4 ur happiness..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

valentine-less valentine..
in front but behind..
love her but denied..
comes and goes..
sad and cry..
i cried..

2005-02-11T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
the more u noe, the cockier u get..
but the more u noe, the more stupid u find urself 2 b..
tts a mistake of the past i dun wish 2 find in u..
thus back off i shall..a step away,
watching over u...

2005-02-10T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
the book of love, is long and boring,
no one can lift the damn thing,
its full of charts and facts and figures,
and instructions for dancing,
but i love it when u read to me,
and u can read me anything..
the book of love has music in it,
in fact thats where music comes from,
some of it is just transcendental,
some of it is juz really dumb,
but i love it when u sing 2 me,
and u can sing me anything..
the book of love is long boring,
and written very long ago
its full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes,
and things we're all too young to know,
but i love it when u give me things,
and u ought to give me wedding rings..

C

2005-02-09T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
we r impossible 2 b..
in my heart u will stay..
stay away..
i dun wanna cause harm..
i'll b the silent love..

A

2005-02-08T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
innocent u i see,
fear i possess tt something might happen..
protection i wanna give,
but not wif u i am..
true love i can give..
but true love in me u dun find..
ur happiness is all i pray,
may tis new yr b ur best of the past..

S

2005-02-07T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
life rejects my love..
thus i hate life..
time rejects my duties..
thus i hate time..
uncertainty of her waryness of me..
i feel no hate..
my love has now no place 2 go..
hope she feels..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

feel,
like i do..
connection,
i wish..
come,
i hope..
harm,
i wun give..
love,
i gladly give..
only if u are wif me..

S

2005-02-06T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
infiltration causes pollution of thoughts..
chaos of life..
confusion of feelings..
confession avoided 2 shield ur innocent mind..
i sacrifice..

O

2005-02-05T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
我要把浪漫送给你，
给你跃动不已的心灵，
闪烁发亮的梦想。

N

2005-02-04T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
quiet i may be..
happiness i can give..
but love i cannot get..
pointless..

D

2005-02-03T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
boring nature of life filled wif love..
lovely life filled wif joy..
joyfully lovely life filled wif her..
again..
i fall in love..

R

2005-02-02T12:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
she sucks out love from me..
too deep..again..im afraid..
blur as she is,she doesnt noe..
may tis b kept,
so no harm goes 2 her..

A

ConfesS

2005-02-01T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
something bad i did just,
confession im making now..
quarrels involved..fights avoided..
mind in a state of unrest,
fact unaccepted tt no blows made..
may something happens quick,
itching 4 an inflict of injury..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

we feel love,
love feels nth,
so does she..

solemn rest within,
no1 noes..
wake up kid..
no1 will give a damn..

Between the BlooD

2005-01-29T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
unwanted rudeness of brother terrorising the house,
causing riots between the blood..
overflowing,
crashing every1's life like a tsunami,
waves growing bigger..
the bright side is..it'll b over..
someday..

_|_

2005-01-25T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
fashion boosts looks,
looks in2 fashion,
shows shallow minds of ppl blindly following..
stupidity arising,
meaningless explanation occurring,
4get it..like who cares..

ReflectioN

2005-01-24T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
hard life, soft bed, easy time..
shows how relax things r taken when its 1000 times harder than wat life has given..
mindless youngsters living in the world of comfy..
neglecting the world of hardship..
may suffering appear, keeping senses 2gether, feeling the reason of wateva they have..

Sorrow-ness

2005-01-23T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
meaningless love of hopeless,
drunk to the core of unconciousness,
wake up 2 the world of evilness,
continue living in nothingness..

BlurreD MinD

2005-01-20T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
clarity of mind blurred,
by endless thick clouds of smog,
poisoning me to show my feeble self,
wif all the pains floating,
while drowning my health 2 the endless depths of no return..

TsunamI of BlooD

2005-01-16T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
past relived..
calm destroyed..
confusion occurred..
sadness revived..

Emotion Chaos

2005-01-15T00:00:00.001+08:00

hi,
memories are a reminder tt u cannot hav dem back..
its not gd..its a torture..
widespread of chaos like an epidemic..
hardly stoppable..
endless struggle for cureless disease..
like me..and my heart..

The Calm

2005-01-14T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
calender of pain im looking,
endless dates of hurt im recalling..
future time of lonely living,
like the past that i 4got..
2 yrs it has been..

..Lost of Life..

2005-01-13T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
a 100% lost..
my love was given..
cant be returned..
needed 2 replenish..
but who will it b?
my life is gone..a new life is needed..but a death is imminent..
hope she gains clarity..4 tt..i dun mind suffering in the unperishable flames of hell..

Downs

2005-01-11T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
a bumpy ride..experiencing..
things tt i've built..trampled..
worthless being typing..
pointless complains and whining..
help i do not need..the original u is all i want..
pain i inflicted..pain i felt..
love i given..love not felt..
life unwanted..life i will throw..
last entry it may b..to god:
pls save me..

The Awakening..

2005-01-10T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
skinning my life outta me..
i worry in vain..
slicing the heart in me..
i cried 4 nth..
love USED TO be the stronger the betta,like drugs..
immunity too concentrated 4 drugs nowadays..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
every1's busy,
im alone..
no company..
nth 2 do..
still in misery..

Dots to my Thoughts

2005-01-09T12:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
my skull's being thick 2day..
cuz nth crossed my mind..
my heart felt like its being squeezed by a cage of ribs..
mixture of nothingness and negatives brought my confusion..
insanity pulls away sanity,coming closer 2 me..
mindless words outta me gapping things WIDER..
coming of regrets..
regrets of coming..
despair 4 life..

The Great Depression

2005-01-08T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
truth revealed..cant say..
heart torment..there's no1..
here alone..no1 knows..
wif eternal pain i shall suffer wif eternal fear..

Slavery Denied

2005-01-07T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
money..
hard 2 earn and easy 2 spend..
same as paper..
hard 2 fill and easy 2 tear..
slavery job gives minimal and treated like animal..
1 nite it may b..but thousands of hates developed within..

but xcuse me..
treatment DENIED!

A Boring Happiness

2005-01-06T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
exhausted i am,diary i muz write
needle of boredom injected in2 my life,a sharp pain but only notices it when its over..
needle i feel like as well,small and unnoticable..
a long everlasting thread wif its influence tied behind sewing 2 b part of my life..
tangled by it..i move on..throwing cloths of time away..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
loneliness i gain is the peace tt i obtained..
peace brings happiness..and boring happiness is thus produced..
gd nite..

Nothing Changed

2005-01-05T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
looks r core 2 life..wif looks,u get more fwends and better lovers..
once again..hope june will b betta..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
money is the root of 1 huge evil at home..filial piety is non-existent in the world nowadays..
big house..big car..and a big prob of financing it..

thoughts running through tis short blog..it took me more than half..
im afraid..can u tell?

New World -----> Girls~~

2005-01-04T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
non compulsory & unwanted school life begins..
fun is the main engine but fun is not wat i get..
girls intruding in2 my conservative life,messing the rythmic beat of peace
nightmares of a racist came true,nightmares are wat i'll get..
tis will end when i had enough,hope june will b betta,in my new faraway campus..
it is there where the siblings will meet..

Another Day Existed

2005-01-03T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
old fwends come 2gether,memories landed on the the helipad of my brain..
wif the chopper spinning up the old times we spent everyday..
best fwend's still as cool..childhood fwend's still as cute..
days we spent will nv b back..so r all the gd things tt we had..tts the bad part of life..
1 by 1 they will leave..leaving the unluckiest behind..
alone he walks the road of endless despair..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
value of things only show if they r gone..by den..it will stay gone..
cherish all u hav..good nite..

A Great Fuck Off for a New Year

2005-01-02T00:00:00.000+08:00

hi,
irresponsible ppl playing responsible ones out,tis is how it goes..
xcuses used to cover the fact tt they r irresponsible,blame pushing used as a form of denial of own fault..clearly shown by 3 cousins..
family ties broke down due 2 external threats,
threats r wat keeps us FURTHER apart..
feels tt im existing in nothingness 2day,total waste of time..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
cars drifting love outta me,
overloading total capacity,
like burnt rubber leaving trails all over,
permanently attracted to its beauty...

Happy New Year

2005-01-01T00:00:00.000+08:00

Hi,
new year new blog?juz a coincidence..
lemme introduce myself all over again:
im wei jian
tts all..happy new year everybody